Strongbad email

Yeah, I wrote a children’s book. Who hasn’t?

In other words: if Strongbad could do it, so can I.

Dear Strongbad,

I mean dear… whatever.

Back in 2001 I was one of those kids who tuned in to Homestarrunner.com every week to watch the latest installment of Strongbad emails. Out of all the hundreds of webisodes, there is one that has been so ingrained in my head all these years that it actually inspired me to do something silly: I wrote a children’s book.
Because as Strongbad points out:

Kids can barely read as it is, so how hard can it be??

While Strongbad was able to “write” a book that taught kids important vocabulary words like: fangoriously, gelatinous, and linebacker he MAY have had a little strategic advantage in the form of just crossing out and replacing parts of an existing book. If only it were so easy!

My own book-writing journey started with jotting down ideas and doodles while riding the bus. They mostly reflected my frustration over the censoring, and sometimes outright banning, of classic books like Roald Dahl’s Witches or Dr. Seuss’s Mulberry Street. I couldn’t see any good coming from the removal of ideas to meet current-day sensibilities, but all I did was doodle.

I never intended to do anything with these notes until I was unable to find the kinds of books I would want to read to my own kids. Aesop’s Fables are great, but old-fashioned, and there’s no way I’d be buying a copy of Anti-R@c*$t Baby; so I sat down at my computer to make an honest go of creating a book to be ‘published’. If nothing else, I figured I’d learn a new skill or two along the way, but at best I’d be making my own small contribution to introducing the values of liberty and free thought to children.

Easy, right?

I had no idea how much there was to learn!

While there are many tools and resources available for self-publishers, I didn’t expect how steep a learning curve making a book would be! It seems like such a simple object.

I recognized very quickly that it’s one thing to doodle in a notepad, but entirely another to do it “IN THE COMPUTER”.
… even more-so when your experience is limited to creating greeting cards.
Maintaining consistency across multiple pages was a daunting task, selecting a colour pallet when the options are endless is overwhelming, and figuring out fonts… forget about it!

But, as my grandmother used to say:

It’s like eating an elephant. Do it one bite at a time.

I established the line weights I liked, added one character or element at a time, and made notes to help me find my way back because making one change likely means you really need to make 30 changes!

And that’s just the creative part. Then there is the business of book-making.

From paper-weights, to page number requirements. From what the heck is a print-on-demand service, to how the heck to actually promote a book?? My ‘simple’ project turned into a crash course in publishing, marketing, and everything-in-between. After all that, my only advise is: figure out what you don’t know quickly and make a plan to fill that gap! I was lucky enough to find the Tom Woods Author’s Academy, a group specifically for freedom loving self-publishers. My kind of weirdos. It was tremendously helpful just to have access to others at their own stages of the book-making journey. They may have had more practical advice to offer than Strongbad…

Now, after a few mis-steps and a million tiny tasks, I can proudly say that my first book “A Th*nk that’s Free” is in production and almost available for purchase.

Maybe next time, I’ll just find another book and just cross out some bits because there really is no “wrong” way, right?

As Strongbad says:

Everyone is different. No two people are not on fire.

Education at its finest.

I hope you’ll add A Th*nk that’s Free to your collection! Check out the store to be one of the first to order.
Or Contact us if you have a book idea you’d love to see come to life, I’m happy to share what I’ve learned.

Crapfully yours,

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